Women Going Through a Breakup Need To Read These Books

Heed their wisdom in the matter of breaking hearts apart.

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Well, it is done. There’s no going back from this (or is it?), you two cannot coexist together anymore as a couple and need to go your separate ways.

It hurts, it hurts so much to put all the time and effort into something only to have it come undone right before you.

To deal with these difficult moments you need to develop your emotional intelligence and resiliency. Some develop these early in life. Some need to put the work later to finally achieve it. Whatever you think it might be your case, these books specifically written for women tell you exactly how to get over a breakup. Take a look at them if you want to know which pitfalls to avoid.

#1 Trash the Dress: Stories of Celebrating Divorce in your 20s by Joelle Caputa

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We’ve cried. We’ve conquered. We’re telling it like it is. Trash the Dress: Stories of Celebrating Divorce in your 20s features interviews with over 70 young divorcees worldwide. Learn why young women got hitched and then ditched, about their daily struggles, and most importantly, how they’re celebrating their divorces. Follow along as participants trash their wedding dresses, get transformational tattoos, host divorce parties, check adventures off their bucket lists, reflect on lessons learned and even fall in love again. Tapping into the professional expertise of participants, Trash the Dress: Stories of Celebrating Divorce in Your 20s spotlights top getaway destinations from a travel agent, healing advice from a therapist, steps for rocking the divorcee title from a lawyer, and meditative methods from a yogi. Trash the Dress will guide and inspire as you embark on the most exciting journey of your life thus far: divorce.

#2 Relationships Unscripted: Relationships are Improvised. Learn the Rules. Be Successful. by Ben Winter

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It’s possible that your relationships didn’t work out because of a simple set of rules that were never followed by one or both parties. Relationships are improvised. Learn the rules. Be successful. By learning what happened, possibly why it happened, you can prevent the same issue in the future.

#3 Runaway Husbands by Vikki Stark

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Real life stories of women who were abandoned without warning; understanding that you’re not alone; discover what motivates men to act this way and how you can recover from it. This book was a tremendous help in my healing process.

#4 Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach

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Offers practical guidance to feeling worthy and ending our suffering. She explains how to overcome fear and shame (can be applied to anything) and how to develop compassion for yourself. It helped me to stop beating myself up over things I couldn’t control. A buddhist approach to healing.

#5 Better Apart by Gabrielle Hartely & Elena Brower

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A caring and compassionate view of being alone after divorce. It allowed me to understand how strong and independent I can be through practical advice and spiritual guidance. How shifting your mindset is the most important part of embracing your new life.

#6 Bitch Up! Expect More, Get More by Leslie Braswell

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After a heart-wrenching breakup, a woman often suffers from self-doubt and low self-esteem. Emotionally hurt, some of her behaviors end up reinforcing those feelings. This book seeks to empower women by giving them helpful tools to avoid this along with a new perspective so they can move forward with confidence and carry their head high.

#7 My Cat Won’t Bark! (A Relationship Epiphany) By: Kevin Darne

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Breakups and divorces are essentially a public admission a mistake was made in someone’s mate selection process. Each of us chooses our own friends, lovers, and spouse. Each of us has our own mate selection/screening process and must haves list. Each of us has our own boundaries and deal breakers.

If you go to the grocery store to purchase an apple but buy an onion instead; whose fault is that? Do you curse the onion for not being an apple? No! You learn to become a better shopper!

The goal is to choose someone who shares your same values and wants the same things for the relationship you do. This would also be someone who naturally agrees with you on how to obtain those things. Last but not least the two of you would have a mutual depth of love and desire for each other.

Compatibility trumps compromise. Like attracts like and opposites attract divorce attorneys! There is no amount of work or communication which can overcome being with someone who simply does not want what you want. If you or your mate has to change your core being in order to make a relationship work you’re probably with the wrong person! Life is too short to be trying to change water into wine.

There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships. We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them as is or move on. The choice is up to us! Suffering is optional.

There are three basic reasons why couples split up.

1. They chose the wrong mate. (In other words they are too incompatible.)
2. A deal breaker was committed in the eyes of one of them.
3. They fell out of love or stopped wanting the same things over time.

#8 Superhero of Love by Bridget Fonger

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Superhero of Love: Heal Your Broken Heart & Then Go Save the World gently takes the reader’s hand and leads them through a step-by-step process to move from dis-empowered to super-powered. This break-up can be the best thing that ever happened to you if you dive into this book because you will come out the other side as a Superhero of Love, more able to love and be loved than ever before. Bridget Fonger is a longtime health, lifestyle, and relationship writer, whose work has appeared on Huffington Post, Thrive Global, and Quora. She hosts the Superhero of Love Podcast.

#9 The Buddha at My Table by Tammy Letherer

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Can you come sit at the table? Tammy Letherer’s husband of twelve years spoke these words on a Tuesday night, just before Christmas, after he had put their three children in bed. He had a piece of paper and two fingers of scotch in front of him. As he read from the list in his hand, his next words would shatter her world and destroy every assumption she’d ever made about love, friendship, and faithfulness.

In The Buddha at My Table, Letherer describes – in honest, sometimes painful detail – the dismantling of a marriage that encompasses the ordinary and the surreal, including the night she finds a silent, smiling Thai monk sitting at the same dining room table.

It’s this unexpected visitation, this personification of peace, that sticks with her as she listens to her husband reveal hurtful, shocking things – that he never loved her, he doesn’t believe in monogamy, and he wants to “wrap things up” with her in four weeks – and allows her to find the blessing in her husband’s betrayal. Ultimately, it’s when she realizes that she is participating in her life, not at its mercy, that she discovers the path to freedom.

#10 It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken by Greg Behrendt

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It’s Called A Break Up Because It’s Broken is a must have. One of the statements I still quote to this day many years after reading this book was from Amiira she said having a broken heart is like having broken ribs. On the outside no one can see it, but every breath hurts.

#11 How To Get Over a Broken Heart by Guy Winch

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The heart wants what it wants even when it wants the wrong person. This TedTalk was thought-provoking and is specifically aimed at anyone who was disappointed in love. It also provides actionable advice on how to get unstuck from the endless circle of mourning unsatisfied expectations.

#12 Connect: How to Love and Accept Yourself After Divorce by Dawn Burnett

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The best book to read after a breakup is one that supplies a fool proof plan on how to find love for self so you don’t repeat the same patterns in relationships. The biggest remnant that follows a breakup is the need to find oneself, learning to love and accept yourself during a time of upheaval. Connect How To Love And Accept Yourself After Divorce is full of incredible advice on how to thrive instead of survive after a breakup. The 11 relatable stories take readers on a journey showing them how they can push past fears and struggles and build their confidence, so they can live the life they’ve been dreaming of.

#13 Milk and Honey by Rupi Kaur

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This book has four chapters, each specified for something else and a different purpose. For example, one can heal a different pain, while another can heal a different heartache. The book takes its readers through the bitterest moments of life and finds ways to make them sweet. There is always a positive side … if you’re willing to look for it.

#14 I Gave Up Men For Lent by Kacie Main

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In I Gave Up Men for Lent, Kacie tells her own story of self-reflection, but really she is telling the story of every girl who is trying to balance pursuing love with defining her own self-worth; every child trying to build healthy adult relationships with their family members; every young professional trying to understand the intersection of motivation and contribution. Read this book and you’ll better understand yourself and those you love the most!

#15 A Better Next: A Novel by Maren Cooper

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A Better Next was just named to Parade’s 10 Books to Read When Family Drama Is Consuming Your Life and “… is a sensitive drama that follows the day-by-day challenges of starting over.”

A smart, relatable story for every woman who’s gone bold to sort out her next chapter, A Better Next shows how – with a little soul searching and a supportive circle of friends and colleagues – it’s possible to redefine happiness and establish a liberating, new normal at any stage of life.

#16 The Art of The Date by Rori Sassoon

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Described as a Chicken Soup for the Soul meets Sex and The City, The Art of the Date give readers the ultimate guide to navigating Manhattan’s dating scene, and beyond. The book is the first in a trilogy series that explores the secrets to a healthy relationship and how to navigate the complex dating scene.

Written by Eve O'Rourke

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